Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Do you have Pigitis?

Yes. Pigitis! No not the swine flu, but just as deadly. Pigitis can destroy any relationship and there is only one known cure and for most it tastes terrible and is very hard to swallow. Have you ever watched pigs in the pen all full of mud fighting over there spot in chow line. They cast off all restraint. They will run there own piglets over to get to the slop or jockey for position. This is a reoccurring theme with those who have developed a case of pigitis. It's all about them. This disease that can be so devastating, if it goes unchecked can leave you all alone and broken. The ramifications of this disease will keep people away from you. In fact they will begin to avoid you as your symptoms are more present and visible to their eyes. So what could be so devastating a sickness that could ruin your entire life? So examine yourself honestly of course and if you dare have your spouse examine you. 1. Am I immature? I mean immaturity in the fact that as your relationship exits the bliss stage and real life gets crowded by many new moving parts that you don't get the same overwhelming attention you once did in the courting stage. 2. What do you choose to do with your spare time? When I say spare time. I mean after you punch out from work what do you choose to do? If your list doesn't have spouse at number one, not good. 3. Are you insensitive? Do you listen to your spouse,empathize with them, and give them appreciation or words of encouragement? 4. Are you stubborn, headstrong, or pigheaded? Have you ever laid down your guns in the fight even when you knew you were 100% in the right. Humble yourself lately?
Selfishness is a destroyer of mass proportions. The problem with selfishness is big and sometimes goes completely unknown for long periods of time. I know you have run into someone or have relative who is always telling you about what she's doing, the vacation she just went on, the new stuff she got this week at the mall, and then they tell you all about what their kids are doing or what their husbands are doing for them, never once asking a single question about you or how your life is going. Just like the pig in the pen their only concern is for what they want or gotta have or they think their entitled too. Anything that comes against those desires is viewed as the enemy. Now you can also be pushed over the edge to a selfish behavior pattern by not getting the things you deem as necessities in your relationship. Intimate contact, quality time, encouraging or kind words, physical intimacy, and respect just to name a few. When met with deficiency or lack we tend to go defensive as human beings. We're hurt so we push away so we don't get hurt again but this solves nothing and drives a deeper wedge into the relationship. The bottom line is this. "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves"
Phi 2:3 NIV
Sounds easy right? I know it can be difficult but to change the dynamic of any relationship someone has to take the first step. "Humble yourselves before the Lord and he will lift you up". James 4:10 If you humble yourself and think of others better than yourself and serve others with a pure heart you will see amazing results.
Remember it's all about your motives. You must not be expecting a certain result or immediate return. Then your motives are simply for selfish reasons. Do these things because God says if you "delight yourself in him and commit your way to him and trust him with the outcome, he will give you the desires of your heart". Psalm37 4-5
That sounds a whole lot better than in the mud and mire of the pigpen.

Excerpts taken from "The 10 Commandments of Marriage" By Ed Young

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